New from Tiger, Angry Birds!

I’ve always had a love hate relationship with Tiger handheld games. When I was a kid I was easily swayed by their slick commercials promising an arcade in the palm of your hand. Time after time I got them and time after time I was disappointed by an over simplistic repetitive piece of code turd inside a promisingly attractive shell. I know part of the blame rested on me, I mean fool me once... So the other day I began wondering what had happened to them and dare I say it, I missed them.

So in honor of the dead, I decided to do a few updated classics starting with my favorite Angry Birds. While drawing it I came up with a defined set of gameplay ideas while staying true to the Tiger formula, a little bit of the license and a lot of crap gameplay. So here we go!

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Instructions:

- Use the Directional Pad to select the trajectory of the bird’s flight.

- Hit the fire button to launch your bird.

- The pigs will dance back and forth so it’s up to you to time your drop perfectly. Hit them all and advance to the next level, but be warned, they get faster and harder to hit!

- You have three birds, once they are through it is game over!

- If you collect a golden egg you will get access to the Mighty Golden Eagle! A Golden Eagle advances you to the next level.

- Since this is a Tiger game, there is no ending, the game loops past world 4-18.

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I’m set to do at least one more so if you have an idea for one, let me know in the comments!

The lost 3ds warning.

After wading though the massive lines of one at kmart this morning I emerged the proud owner of a brand new Nintendo 3ds. Then after fooling around with the 3d toggle bar I decided to kick it to the max and see what this baby can do. At once I was dizzy and nauseous and I swear at one point it tore a hole in the fabric of time and space, but I didn't care, this thing is awesome. It's like rubbing your eyes and watching the cascade of fireworks explode atop the dark canvas of your eyelids wishing that you could see it forever, but after a while your eyes start to burn like Icarus too close to the sun and you are plummeted to the ground from whence your began, the fading lights becoming a diminished trail of beauty. Still there should be a warning, I don't know if eye cancer is a real thing, but I'm pretty sure this causes it.

The system is amazing though, the augmented 3d cards made me wet myself; the 3d in general is great, I mean why couldn't I have had this as a kid, instead I got the Virtual Boy and a bottle of Tylenol; the software is chock full of fun apps and blows away any gaming os I've ever seen in terms of fun apps except for iOS which Nintendo is trying to become; the graphics are really quite cool looking, especially in 3d where you can get a sense for the weight of a character; the buttons are spot on the best I've used, clicky and not at all mushy like the 3ds lite; and finally, pilotwings is just plain awesome, seriously it's like they played a crap ton of the n64 version right before developing it, not crazy on the reliance of miis though...I hate miis so much.

As happy as I am with it, there are a few problems.

#1 Dear Nintendo, why would you put the power button where the start and select button used to go? I mean seriously! SERIOUSLY!
#2 The battery is meh. It isn't as bad as my 3gs iPhone (where I would jump for joy at 3 hours) but it isn't great.
#3 I don't like the shiny plastic coat on the shell, it makes it feel like a cheap Asus netbook. The hinges are also a bit loose which doesn't inspire great confidence in putting it in your pocket.
#4 Viewing angles of 3d. It doesn't ruin the experience but when you are trying to weave through 3d terrain in hopes of shaving off seconds on your time in Pilotwings you find yourself getting blurred rather easily. Again, it doesn't ruin the experience, it just removes you from the game a bit. At medium setting though, I didn't have many problems with this, but dang does full 3d look beautiful. Hopefully this will be fixed by new panels in the next go around and since my wife has already stated she wants one of her own, I'll probably be upgrading.
#5 No internet browser. Dear Lord Nintendo, why did you put an icon for it if it doesn't exist and tells you to wait for an update?!?

Plan B.

I have to say, playing through Pokemon White while all the chaos was occurring in Japan was a constant mix of joy and sadness, especially due to the fact that it is set in pseudo-Japan. I am overjoyed that the possible nuclear plant meltdown was averted, the above was the first thing I thought of when I heard that they were pumping water to cool the rods, a task I felt could be handled by more accomplished unmanned delivery systems.

Charli-o's Cereal!

Done for the Art Jumble Undesirable Cereals theme. I somehow missed uploading last week's entries so I combined the two weeks' topics.

Sheen's Crazy...like a fox!

A few pieces for the Art Jumble Charlie Sheen topic.

Charlie Sheen: The Video Game. Outlast the cops while snort--I mean eating the lines and grab the powerups.


Joker/Sheen mashup. That ain't white paint by the way. He would actually be a great villain, a cross between the Joker and Bane with his tiger blood and flaming fists.

The Birds

A piece done for art jumble's Alfred Hitchcock movie posters theme. BTW, not to brag, but I finally 3-starred the Valentine's Day update so yah...I'm kind of a big deal. Currently I'm ranked #239,201. I'm now addicted to replaying levels to edge out other people, so if you're #239,200...I'm coming for ya!